Log 21

Concluding Entangled Logs:

A lot happened after submitting my thesis. I went through multiple phases, and now I have reached a place of peace. A lot went to self-reflection and acceptance. There were times when I felt that everything was pointless. But a major realization happened once I detached my identity from the self.

Freedom:

Detaching that identity allowed me to truly become someone who doesn’t have any expectations in life. It comes after accepting one’s weaknesses and desires. These may sound a bit cliché, but there is a layer of wisdom in them. They have to be realized and felt. Without those, they are just a few words that carry no significant meaning.

Desires and Expectations:

Most of the problems in life are the result of expectations. I expected to have X by Y years. Once that was contradicted, the world fell apart. Then, when seeing others meeting the same expectations, created a sense of hopelessness. It is as simple as that. My problems were all the result of my expectations. Expectations that I learned and set for myself. After accepting myself, these things vanished. What can I expect from life? Failure.

But this time, it has a ring to it. Failure is actually a good thing. It teaches a lesson. The most important lesson I learned is that nothing matters in the face of time. Advice, degrees, status, materials, wealth, etc., are just our constructs. The objective here is to take action. We must take action. Actions compound. It’s that simple.

Closure:

Despite realizing these facts, I wasn’t taking any action. Each page for a log became an expectation. Thus, it was supposed to be a benchmark to reach. - Try logging in every day. Look at that. There is no value in it. It is meaningless to have such expectations. How can someone so inconsistent suddenly start committing to building new things every day? Things take time, and it’s okay.